January was good, but it ended on
a sore note. You must be expecting a detailed account of what happened between
January and February, but I must disappoint you in this matter. It was not good
and for most parts rather ugly and let’s just leave it at that and continue
forward. The end of January started for me a rather solemn and modest period, I
was lost most of the time in thoughts and all I could think of was the
beautiful days I had in my memories. I cried and wept over the shattered dreams
and with each passing day I was becoming more dilapidated. The seasons changed
and I didn't know and the flowers bloomed and I didn't care and finally I had
gathered too much dust that I had forgotten myself in a solemn corner of my
life.
But, one day I did wake up and
one day I had to tell myself that I had to choose. I reminded myself that I had
the choice between a ‘life of gathering dust in a corner’ and one where I could
just go out and live life as it comes. ‘Carpe Diem’, that’s the choice I made.
It was over an year later that I
seriously started having a life, that is the amount of time it took me to forgo
the once beautiful dreams that had now came back to haunt me. The nightmares
ones broken dreams make are horrendous, almost sinister in intent. The number of
sleepless nights had reduced greatly and I must have had my first good night’s
sleep around that time. But some people never learn and I am one of them. Due
to this particular weakness of mine I had let in my life another somebody.
PS: If you feel completely lost please refer my
previous post. It will help you catch upon the misery.
It was by a rather off chance
that I let February in my life. How it happened is still much fuzzy to me. She
was always there, I must never have had seen her yet or I may just not have
noticed or rather cared to notice. Then
as the days unfolded and as I stared coming out of my self-inflicted hermitage
and started cherishing the world around me, we met. We met, we talked, we
became friends and then something clicked and due to my tenacious friends and
their perseverance in seeing to it that I hook up with someone the idea got
planted in our heads I guess. Over the next year and a half we bonded, it was
not like the first time I was in love, this was different.
She was smart and she was pretty
but the best thing is that she was shorter than me. The most trouble I have
with girls is that they apparently happen to be taller than me or they appear
to do so, which is not a very good thing when you are out looking for company.
But February was the perfect size in that regard, being friends was easy, it
just happened and not much work was necessary neither did I intended to do any
at that point in time, but being in love was a whole lot different. The way it
happened is that one day she asked what I was going to give her for Valentine’s
Day and I asked her what she wanted. She resorted to a shy and sly smile as an
answer and knowing her so well by then I knew what was in her mind and I was happy
that it was the same thing as in mine. Strange ways that love works, huh!
